Paul D'Angelo...A Connecticut Yankee in Omaha
By Stanley Struble, '68
Paul and Mary D'Angelo
Paul D’Angelo, known by many as “Coach D”, is a Connecticut Yankee living in Omaha and he still retains much of the accent that accompanied him. It’s quite a story, but like most people who led interesting lives, it wasn’t a straight line. He had to leave behind much of his former life and family to pursue an athletic scholarship, meet his wife and lifelong partner Mary, initiate a career at Boys Town, and earn the respect of 1,000’s of former students.
Paul was born in Torrington, Connecticut, a blue collar town Northwest of Hartford, the state’s capitol. Paul came from an Italian Catholic family of six. He was the oldest and had one brother and two sisters. His mother, Armida, was a candy striper (nurse’s aide), until he was five, when she became a homemaker. Victor D’Angelo, his father was a factory worker before moving up into management. He also worked at Tip Top stores repairing televisions and worked as a salesman. Paul’s many cousins, uncles, and two grandfathers were also factory workers. As a young man he was resigned to following the well-worn path of most guys from the region – sports, the mandatory partying, then an eventual marriage, followed by a lifetime of work in one of the many, many industrial factories in the area. The mold was cast and expectations set. When he was old enough, Paul spent five summers working at Union Hardware, a company that manufactured sporting goods equipment such as ice skates and golf clubs. Hard work, and lots of it, Paul reports. He also was the drummer in three different rock bands during this period.
Like many Baby Boomers, Paul came of age in the 60’s, a time of turmoil and socio-cultural conflicts such as the Vietnam War, Civil Rights Movement, A.I.M. (American Indian Movement), and the role/gender movement such as the N.O.W. (National Organization of Women). Paul reports that he had a restless, rebellious nature as a young man that was ultimately funneled into sports. He was an outstanding athlete in high school. He played JV basketball several years and earned numerous varsity letters in soccer and baseball. He played both sports all four years and won accolades as Player of the Year in soccer his senior year, and twice in baseball his junior and senior years. Although Paul seriously considered joining the military, his father was adamantly opposed, insisting that he pursue an athletic scholarship and avoid the Asian debacle that had split Americans right down the middle. St. Gregory’s College in Shawnee, Oklahoma desperately needed a catcher of Paul’s caliber and enticed him to move far away from home by offering him a baseball scholarship, including room & board. The training, table, as all athletes know, is a big deal. Although Paul had never shown much interest in academics and really didn’t consider himself a serious student, he did consider himself a rebel, and after much consideration he decided to accept the challenge of college and the athletic scholarship, which clearly put him on a path separate from many previous generations of D’Angelos.
Paul enjoyed a successful athletic tenure at St. Gregory’s, which included a near miss at the Jr. College College World Series in Grand Junction, Colorado. His second year at St. Gregory’s they were in the regional finals, but suffered a loss to another Oklahoma team, Bacone, a Catholic College out of Muskogee Oklahoma that was the 1967 National Champion. Bacone beat them 1-0 and went on to Grand Junction, but quickly bowed out after one game. After completing his first two years at St. Gregory’s, Paul tried out for the University of Central Oklahoma baseball team in nearby Oklahoma City. He was again offered and accepted a room & board scholarship. So Paul was now living in the big city, playing ball and working part-time to make ends meet. As we all know, lots of young ladies have been known to attend college at places like this, and it so happened that his roommate’s lady friend had a girlfriend named Mary, and he wanted to introduce them. Would Paul meet with her? As fate would have it, Paul went along and discovered that on that particular day it happened to be Mary’s birthday. She was a pretty young lady from Omaha who had graduated from Notre Dame High School. She was majoring in history and pursuing a teaching degree at U.C.O. Paul was a poor, struggling athlete with few resources and so Mary took him to the Sonic and bought him a hamburger – on her birthday! When he apologized for the lack of funds, she reportedly said, “Don’t worry, you’ll pay me back.” And the hook was set. Paul and Mary subsequently completed their degrees in 1972, Paul with a degree in biology and Mary with a degree in history and a teaching certification. They had married the last semester of their senior year. Neither attended their graduation because both had to work, Mary as a waitress and Paul at the Conoco Carwash.
Paul subsequently went to work for Warner Communications/Independent News as a news representative in Oklahoma City, but frequent trips to visit Mary’s parents in Omaha was opening new horizons and interests. On one such visit in 1974, someone suggested to him that with his background, skills sets, and interests that he might be a natural to work at a place called Boys Town, which he really knew very little about.
Paul applied and was hired. He began teaching in 1974. It was something he had never done and he was naturally experiencing the usual misgivings and anxiety about his decision. He wasn’t alone. This was a time of the great transition at Boys Town upon the departure of long-time director Msgr. Wegner and the first year for Msgr. Francis Hupp, the new director of the Home. It’s well documented that this was a very difficult period for Boys Town. New leaders and administrators arrived with an untested program with no provenance or history and ideas that had never been implemented in a youth care setting - residential or schools. Many people left the Home during this period, many of them involuntarily. Those that stayed and the many new people that arrived were willing to give the new Family Home Style Program a try. And, of course, it was a work in progress since it had never been done before and this actually took several years of trial and error. Although many of the youth were unaware of the changes or little concerned about them, such was not the case for the staff. It was a time not of great uncertainty, unrest, and confusion.
Paul reports that many of the students just came to class and put their heads down to sleep on their desks. “There was no one telling them they couldn’t or shouldn’t.” Paul, still a relatively young man himself, recalls that on his first day on the job, he was walking with two youths he didn’t know. He made a comment on their conversation and was rebuked profanely by one of the youths, who called him a MF. Paul promptly introduced himself to the youth by grabbing him by the lapels and pinning him to a wall, explaining to him why is was very unwise to speak to someone in such a rude manner. The youth apologized, but Paul knew he had messed up. Convinced that he would be fired for his angry response, he wrote out his resignation letter then went to self-report his behavior to the principal. Dr. Moss told him not to worry about it, “just don’t do it again.”
Eventually the program tightened up and the kids began to behave better. As regards the kids, he says he believes “I learned more from them, than they did from me.” As we all know, if adults don’t have expectations, the kids don’t either. In many ways, Paul recalls the transition years favorably and remembers them as a time when “there was nowhere to go but up, for the kids.” He fondly recalls the names of many of the boys – now too many to recall or mention here, and the infamous sites like Chicago’s Cabrini Green, from which they arrived.
De Angelo’s coaching career at Boys Town started out modestly. In 1975 he worked as an unpaid volunteer to coach the catchers. Then he became the JV coach under
Paul with two Boys Town Alumni. L-R: Ray Alexander, '76, Stan Struble, '68, Paul D'Angelo
Head Coach Dave Benedict from 1977 - 85. He was JV baseball coach under Benedict for 10 years, '75-'85. “Dave Benedict and Jim Mitchell both were true mentors,” Says D’Angelo, “I learned so much about coaching and how to handle young athletes from them.” But the position came without a paycheck, Paul discovered. When Coach Benedict learned that Paul wasn’t being paid, he shared his own coach’s stipend with him. Paul also worked under Head Coaches Rick Berlin and Bill Stott, then in 1986 he became the Head Baseball Coach. Bob Shields and Dan Schneiss helped coach for a couple of years, but it was Jim, (Bongo) Bailey who assisted him year after year during this period and was such a big help on so many things. Very few full-time teachers taught during the summers at BT, but Paul was one who did, and this enabled him to coach Legion baseball for the BT kids. Paul was very happy coaching baseball. He recalls that he had many good teams and players, and that at least nine of his players went on to play college baseball somewhere for differing lengths of time. But in 1992, BT decided to drop spring baseball, and so he retired from coaching.
All careers are fraught with challenges and disappointments alongside successes and joy. Paul earned his Master’s degree in 1984 from the University of Nebraska – Omaha and taught science at Boys Town for 38 years, an unusually longtime. In 1985 he was selected as Boys Town’s Teacher of the Year. He vividly remembers the various challenges of teaching at BT. New ideas, new methods, new administrators, and new Executive Directors all created a challenging environment to which the teachers had to adapt. Sometimes it appeared that the goal was the same, but that they were reinventing the wheel. It wasn’t always easy, but Paul and other dedicated staff bowed their necks and went to work every day for the Kids. Paul and his wife Mary were both longtime teachers at BT. When they both started, Paul reports that Jimmy Mitchell, a very well-known BT alumnus and athlete (12 Major Varsity Letters) “was so helpful to Mary and I when we first started. So much so that we chose him as Godfather for our son Pat.”
And it all worked out. Mary taught Geography and Government and was the Department Head. Paul “taught science and was also the Department Head. For personal reasons, Mary eventually decided to leave Boys Town where she had taught for so many years. Mary was loved by youth and staff alike, but thought it in her best interest to move on to greater challenges and a nurturing environment. She began teaching at Westside High School in Omaha and promptly began building a great reputation there. In 2012 she won the school’s Bell Award as the outstanding teacher. But unbeknownst to her she, had also been nominated for, and also won an even greater, more prestigious prize, the District 66 Phillip and Teri Shrager Award, for Outstanding Teacher. It also came with a $10,000 stipend. Westside’s gain was Boys Town’s loss.
The Connecticut Yankee is still in Omaha. Paul retired from teaching and Boys Town in 2012. “I loved Boys Town and I loved the kids,” he states emphatically. He still meets regularly with some of the youths he taught and helped over the years, as he admires their courage and progress in life. Paul says he stayed at Boys Town so long for five reasons: He loved teaching and he loved science. He loved baseball and he loved the coaches with whom he worked. He absolutely loved the diversity and background of the different kids he encountered daily. He believes he worked with the very best teachers that a school could have. And last, but certainly not the least, he was able to work alongside his wife as a teacher for twenty-five years. Is that cool or what?
Paul now works part-time for his son to stay busy and occupy his time, and he still watches a lot of sports – mostly baseball. His two grandkids, Joe and Sofia are both ballplayers so he’s having a lot of fun with them. He’s still playing the drums, this time in a local Omaha rock band called the Normandy Invasion and occasionally has a local gig. If you’re feeling nostalgic or if you had Paul or Mary as a teacher or coach, you might want to reach out and say, “hey” one of these days. They’d like to hear from you.